Wow...

So much to talk about.. it's been forever...

Let's start where we left off.

I worked for LJMS (La Jolla Music Society) this August and it was fun-fillled and action packed with more than a little stress on the side. Last year all I did was have fun because at the end of the day, the ball was on someone else's shoulders and this year all of that fell to me. This is not to say I didn't have fun. There were more than a couple work parties and a certain night which ended in a skinny swim at 3:00 am, but that's another story I shall have to keep to myself (at least not on the web so if you want info, call me.)

Juvenile Moments

For the last six days I've managed to act completely normal, as if we were nothing more than we are, a musician and his stage manager. Now all of the sudden I'm staring. Right now on his last night, I can't stop looking at his face, the curve of his jaw line up to his cheeks. the shape of his nose and lips. I watch his eyes staring off into the distance, preying he doesn't look my way, because I wouldn't be able to hide my fascination. I would be undeniably caught.

Yet even as I know this, and I know that would be a disaster, I have an uncontrollable urge to connect. Slowly I reach for the pad of paper I keep with me at all times, quietly so as to not disturb even him.

"What are you thinking?" I write and pass the pad to him. He doesn't know what to do with the pad I am passing him and is confused even more by the pen which comes along with it, but as soon as he reads the note, he laughs silently. Inside I cringe with his understanding. The whole thing is so juvenile. I'm passing my crush a note backstage in the dark, with the most unorigional question in the world. He must know in this instant what a dork I am. He must know that I hopelessly adore him.

Still smiling he writes back. "I'm thinking about what I'll be like when I'm 84." He hesitates then writes, "You?"

Trying desperately to save face, I write, "You just looked so serious."

He laughs again without making a sound and settles back into watching the rest of the concert. I'm glowing inside with the fact that I have even talked to him, and known one of his thoughts, while at the same time kicking myself for being so childish.

This is the last time we really talk.

"Twilight Ruined Comic Con"

Image by Howie Muzika via Flickr

But did it really? This has been bugging me since I watched a group of boys carry a sign around the Con painted with exactly that phrase, "Twilight ruined Comic Con."

My question is, "How?" If anything, Comic Con ruined Comic Con. Now before you scream at me how I'm wrong or tell me how crappy Twilight is, think about it.

Twilight is fantasy, with Vampires and werewolves and lore up the wazoo. It is a published novel and feature film with legitimate fans who love the creation. Now you may think it's crappy, and I may have come to see through it's delusions, however, it is fantasy. Comic Con is all about the fantasy, and sci-fi and anything else that can be related through comics.

The things I think don't belong at Comic Con (as much as I love them) are panels for shows like Weeds, or 24 or Bones, because as great as they are, they have nothing to do w

Image by Howie Muzika via Flickr

ith comics or fantasy or sci-fi in any way shape or form. That is what the Con is all about, am I right?

Menahem Pressler (Part Two)

1. Thinks I played a trick on him. ;) (subject of my 7,11th tweet)

2. Is really Yoda in disguise. (Much knowledge has he. Sneak up behind him you must not.)

3. Don't underestimate his fans. They're fierce.

Things You Should Know About Menahem Pressler

**Updated**

1. If you page turn badly he will tell you so. If you page turn well, he will tell you, it was horrible.

2. He is astounded by the amount of people who will show up "to watch him not be ready" in an open rehearsal.

3. His jacket eats pencils.

4. He is more than willing to fuck up the music with you as long as you both make the choice to.

5. His name is Menahem Pressler, therefor be in awe. (I'm completely serious. This is not the sarcasm kicking in. He is amazing and you should all bow at his feet.)

**6. As he brought up himself, he has never said no to me. :)

Home Base Operations (aka Why I'm Not Calling You)

So, I have this job in August that I have been scheduled to do for almost 4 months now. No I don't work for the President, nor do my duties involve life or death on a regular basis, however it is a JOB, and therefor should be taken seriously.

I work most days from 8 am to 10 pm and when I'm not at work, I'm either driving to or from, trying to put together food for my day or sleeping because I'm utterly exhausted. So no, I'm sorry I don't have time to call you, or answer a million texts from you. If this upsets you or you feel slighted, I'm sorry, I can't change that. I've been warning everyone in my life for months now that this was coming, and this is very important to me.

No, I can't just leave the room any time I want to answer the phone, or make a call. I am in the middle of back to back rehearsals most days, both taking care of the performers onstage and solving problems for that evening's concert. Yes I have two assistants, but neither of them have ever been through SummerFest before and therefor I am the only one who knows the answers o questions the musicians might have. That is what I'm here for. The only reason I'm able to write this now, is because I have my computer in front of me while I sit in rehearsal.

This is a job in which I have worked my way up. Last year I was the ASM and this year I am the lead Stage Manager. This is one of the few stage management jobs in which I actually enjoy myself, and feel like I have accomplished something. I work with world famous classical musicians, people who have been in the business for the last 5 decades, like Menahem Pressler who is performing tonight. I get to listen to some of the most amazing musicians performing most intricate music in the world.

This the field that if I do stage manage at all, I will be stage managing in. Classical Music Festivals and concerts.

So when you text me 5 times a day and get upset because I'm not calling you back, know that frankly I am upset that you are tying up my work phone line and interupting the busy schedule that is my day. Yes I miss you, but I am fulfilling my dreams at the moment and I have to put myself first at the moment. (Espeacially when I usually go out of my way and put everyone else first most of the time.)

If you have a problem with that, I can't help you.

If you have no idea what I'm talking about, then don't worry. I love you and I'll see you in a month.

P.S. Maybe if you were more understanding, I would be a little more willing to use my miniscule breaks to call you back.

Purpose

Here I sit at rehearsal for Menahem Pressler and Orion Weiss on my 6th day of work and I thank God for every moment of it. The wonderful sounds I hear everyday while solving problems that challenge both the brain and the heart, inspire me more than any other job I've ever had. My only regret is that I am unable to pause the moment and write all of the creativity that has been pouring into me.

Each of them is so talented, it breaks my heart that it is compounded by each one's sweet and rich personality. I'm astounded these two people exist and are able to play together. I'm even more astonished that I am lucky enough to stage manage for them. I think that stage managing for the classical world, is what I want to do with my life, substituted with inserts from the pop world, but music is definitely the way I want to go.

I can promise however that once things have sorted themselves into more of a rhythm, I will sit down and pound out more of that novel. For now however, I am content to listen to the glorious sounds of Mozart's Sonata for Two Pianos.